Brown 1987
Princeton vs. Brown
October 3rd, 1987
Outcome Unknown
Ladies and gentlemen, in the 200th birthday year of the Constitution, the Princeton University Band takes a up close and personal look at American History.
“Princeton Forward”
The Band has always thought that the Grateful Dead have been years behind the times. Come with us as the Band places the Dead in their proper era. Philadelphia, 1787: Thousands of delegates driving day-glow Conestoga wagons converge on Independence Hall. Excitingly tossing red, white and blue beachballs, the Fed-heds await opening night of the “Life, Liberty and Pursuit of Happiness” Tour. The curtains part; the candelabras dim. Benny Garcia, his black t-shirt hanging out of his tie-dyed breeches, steps to the podium and mumbles the words that will go down in history as the cornerstone of THE AMERICAN SYSTEM OF GOVERNMENT: “We, the dudes and babes of the Altered States of America, in order to form like a total cosmic reality, man, and a laid-back union, do hereby lay down the following groove…” Forming seven fat, sweaty forty-year-old men in the dark, the Band plays, like a patriotic tune.
“National Emblem” (Band forms square with seven people inside)
The Magna Carta is the oldest constitution known to man. But you still can’t cook on it. Ye Olde Ronco proudly presents the self-checking, self-balancing, self-evident, just add voters, so simple even an idiot could run it, instant Constitution. It slices, it dices, it protects your inalienable rights. How much would YOU pay? But wait, there’s so much more. If you order before the Articles of Confederation expire, you’ll also receive this handsome set of ten additional rights not available in any monarchy. If you’re not completely satisfied, return it for a full Restoration, but keep the ten amendments as our gift to you. Ratifiers not included, void where parliamented. Forming George Washington’s Ginsu Knife on the field, the Band plays “Mack the Knife.”
“Mack the Knife” (Band forms a knife)
It’s the new fall season on television, and Sherwood Schwartz, producer of those fine documentaries “Gilligan’s Island” and “Love Boat,” presents the Founding Fathers as “The Brady Bunch.” (sung by announcer “yes I really mean sung…” to “Brady Bunch Theme”)
Here’s the story, of a Mother Country Who was busy with an empire of her own; It was far-flung, with thirteen colonies, The youngest one in curls. Here’s the story, of a man named George, Who was bringing up an army of his own; They were ten thousand men, huddled close together Yes they were very cold. Then one day the British raised the taxes And the colonists knew this really wouldn’t do; So they broke off international relations And they said (sigh) “Fine.”
This fall on Fox Network, re-live the exciting birth of a nation. Arnold Schwartzenegger is…THE RATIFIER. Starring Erik Estrada as Thomas Jefferson Oprah Winfrey as Betsy Ross and Benedict Arnold as “the Treasonable Guy.” Thursdays after “Which One’s My Father?” on Fox.
“Joshua” (Band forms ‘T.V.’)
And remember — Just Say No — to snuff.
October 3rd, 1987
Outcome Unknown
Ladies and gentlemen, in the 200th birthday year of the Constitution, the Princeton University Band takes a up close and personal look at American History.
“Princeton Forward”
The Band has always thought that the Grateful Dead have been years behind the times. Come with us as the Band places the Dead in their proper era. Philadelphia, 1787: Thousands of delegates driving day-glow Conestoga wagons converge on Independence Hall. Excitingly tossing red, white and blue beachballs, the Fed-heds await opening night of the “Life, Liberty and Pursuit of Happiness” Tour. The curtains part; the candelabras dim. Benny Garcia, his black t-shirt hanging out of his tie-dyed breeches, steps to the podium and mumbles the words that will go down in history as the cornerstone of THE AMERICAN SYSTEM OF GOVERNMENT: “We, the dudes and babes of the Altered States of America, in order to form like a total cosmic reality, man, and a laid-back union, do hereby lay down the following groove…” Forming seven fat, sweaty forty-year-old men in the dark, the Band plays, like a patriotic tune.
“National Emblem” (Band forms square with seven people inside)
The Magna Carta is the oldest constitution known to man. But you still can’t cook on it. Ye Olde Ronco proudly presents the self-checking, self-balancing, self-evident, just add voters, so simple even an idiot could run it, instant Constitution. It slices, it dices, it protects your inalienable rights. How much would YOU pay? But wait, there’s so much more. If you order before the Articles of Confederation expire, you’ll also receive this handsome set of ten additional rights not available in any monarchy. If you’re not completely satisfied, return it for a full Restoration, but keep the ten amendments as our gift to you. Ratifiers not included, void where parliamented. Forming George Washington’s Ginsu Knife on the field, the Band plays “Mack the Knife.”
“Mack the Knife” (Band forms a knife)
It’s the new fall season on television, and Sherwood Schwartz, producer of those fine documentaries “Gilligan’s Island” and “Love Boat,” presents the Founding Fathers as “The Brady Bunch.” (sung by announcer “yes I really mean sung…” to “Brady Bunch Theme”)
Here’s the story, of a Mother Country Who was busy with an empire of her own; It was far-flung, with thirteen colonies, The youngest one in curls. Here’s the story, of a man named George, Who was bringing up an army of his own; They were ten thousand men, huddled close together Yes they were very cold. Then one day the British raised the taxes And the colonists knew this really wouldn’t do; So they broke off international relations And they said (sigh) “Fine.”
This fall on Fox Network, re-live the exciting birth of a nation. Arnold Schwartzenegger is…THE RATIFIER. Starring Erik Estrada as Thomas Jefferson Oprah Winfrey as Betsy Ross and Benedict Arnold as “the Treasonable Guy.” Thursdays after “Which One’s My Father?” on Fox.
“Joshua” (Band forms ‘T.V.’)
And remember — Just Say No — to snuff.
