Columbia 1988
Princeton vs. Columbia
October 8th, 1988
Outcome Unknown
The Princeton University Band takes a hardcore look at the Big Apple.
“Princeton Forward”
You wake up to gunshots and sirens. You’re mugged on your way out of the bagel store. Bernard Goetz sits next to you on the subway. A vagrant asks you for a quarter. He used to be your broker. Ah, morning in New York. Only in New York does it cost 150 dollars to take a cab to the U.N., but only a buck fifty for a Rolex from the guy on the corner. Hey Columbia, what do you get when you cross Richard Simmons and Don King? That’s right, Al Sharpton. Forming a can of mace on the field, the Band pays a musical tribute to New York’s subway commuters.
“Another One Bites the Dust” (Band forms can of mace)
Life in New York can be grim. Luckily, there’s so much everyone can do in a big city for entertainment. For example, if you’re Ed Koch, you can visit Bess Myerson every other Sunday from two until four. If you’re Lawrence Taylor, you can get together with Ben Johnson and swap stories. Or, if you’re the Columbia football team, you could watch clips of the 1945 Rose Bowl Game…again. Of course, if you’re looking for cheap entertainment, you could always get a map of New York Harbor and a few pushpins and play that popular new boardgame, “tracking the hospital waste.” Forming a syringe on the field, the Band plays the theme song of New York’s hospital waste disposal units.
“Under the Boardwalk” (Band forms a syringe)
Well Columbia, since you can’t go to the beach, you can always enjoy some good old New York football, uh well, professional football anyways. Too bad all of the the good New York football teams now play in New Jersey. Oh well, there’s always baseball; the Mets are still going strong. Isn’t it nice to see a team in the heat of championship drive? Oh, sorry Columbia, but you can imagine it anyways. Well, we hope the Mets win, but if they don’t we’ll all be pointing the finger at the Mets pitcher, who should have hired a gardener. Speaking of Mets pitchers, the Band forms:
The Band salutes Columbia fans everywhere…both of them.
“Wipeout” (Band forms a ’45’)
October 8th, 1988
Outcome Unknown
The Princeton University Band takes a hardcore look at the Big Apple.
“Princeton Forward”
You wake up to gunshots and sirens. You’re mugged on your way out of the bagel store. Bernard Goetz sits next to you on the subway. A vagrant asks you for a quarter. He used to be your broker. Ah, morning in New York. Only in New York does it cost 150 dollars to take a cab to the U.N., but only a buck fifty for a Rolex from the guy on the corner. Hey Columbia, what do you get when you cross Richard Simmons and Don King? That’s right, Al Sharpton. Forming a can of mace on the field, the Band pays a musical tribute to New York’s subway commuters.
“Another One Bites the Dust” (Band forms can of mace)
Life in New York can be grim. Luckily, there’s so much everyone can do in a big city for entertainment. For example, if you’re Ed Koch, you can visit Bess Myerson every other Sunday from two until four. If you’re Lawrence Taylor, you can get together with Ben Johnson and swap stories. Or, if you’re the Columbia football team, you could watch clips of the 1945 Rose Bowl Game…again. Of course, if you’re looking for cheap entertainment, you could always get a map of New York Harbor and a few pushpins and play that popular new boardgame, “tracking the hospital waste.” Forming a syringe on the field, the Band plays the theme song of New York’s hospital waste disposal units.
“Under the Boardwalk” (Band forms a syringe)
Well Columbia, since you can’t go to the beach, you can always enjoy some good old New York football, uh well, professional football anyways. Too bad all of the the good New York football teams now play in New Jersey. Oh well, there’s always baseball; the Mets are still going strong. Isn’t it nice to see a team in the heat of championship drive? Oh, sorry Columbia, but you can imagine it anyways. Well, we hope the Mets win, but if they don’t we’ll all be pointing the finger at the Mets pitcher, who should have hired a gardener. Speaking of Mets pitchers, the Band forms:
- David Cone’s earned run average during the playoffs,
- the cost, in dollars, of the items Bess Myerson stole,
- the cost, in dollars, to see a movie in Columbus Circle,
- the cost, in pennies, to see a movie on 42nd Street,
- the cost, in dollars, to get the real thing on 42nd street, or
- the number of Garrets currently playing for Princeton,
The Band salutes Columbia fans everywhere…both of them.
“Wipeout” (Band forms a ’45’)
