Brown 2018
Brown at Princeton
October 13th, 2018
Princeton wins 48-10
Homecoming
Pregame:
You can manage dysfunction, it’s the Princeton University Band!
[Band marches on to Princeton Cannon Song]
There’s been a bus strike in Providence! Our hearts go out to dear friends in the Brown Band who almost didn’t make it here today due to the bus shortage. The head of the Rhode Island Association of School Committees has suggested bringing in the National Guard to drive the buses, but we have a better idea: take a ride on the Magic School Bus! They might have gotten baked into pie or turned into a Netflix reboot before they got here, but at least the Frizz would take them on the ride of their lives! Wahooo!
[Band forms a bus and plays Vehicle]
President of the Rhode Island Senate, Dominick Ruggerio, who succeeded President Weed, has a Bachelor of Science degree from Providence College. He didn’t really see a problem with the bus drivers; he thought they were just un-ionized, not unionized! Just like our Double-Double Rotating Phosphorus ion!
[Band forms the Double-Double Rotating P and plays Going Back to Nassau Hall]
Run away band, I’ve got my ion you!
Halftime:
Please accept our apologies in advance, it’s the Princeton University Band!
[Band marches on to Princeton Forward March]
Shiru Café is the newest craze in Providence. The Japanese-owned coffee shop provided students with free coffee – for a price: personal data. Free coffee for sharing a few answers that almost anyone could already find on LinkedIn. Sharing is caring for these Care Bears. But Shiru doesn’t accept offers from “general clientele” regardless of the price they’re willing to pay to get a sip. They’ve only got a thing for Brown University students. And over 69% of Brown students would let anyone take a byte for a free cup of coffee any day. Forming a byte on the field, the band performs Shut Up & Take My Data.
[Band forms a byte and plays Free Ride]
As much fun as this data-sharing revelry sounds, there are latte problems with this free coffee, because the sharing doesn’t stop at the register. Shiru requests that all drinks are consumed on the premises, so many students end up connecting to the WiFi where their data can be given to “unsavory corporate partners they’d rather avoid” like Amazon, HP, and the ever nosy U.S Government. Don’t students dread bytes of their information being stored on God knows who’s hard drives, only to be perused at a later date to stimulate corporate senses? We might dread bytes, but corporates love bytes.
[Band forms a concert arc and plays Also Sprach]
Flashers flash:
DREAD BYTES
Anagrams to:
TEDDY BEARS
Flips to:
SIS BOOM AH!
Run away band, and put that floppy disk away!
October 13th, 2018
Princeton wins 48-10
Homecoming
Pregame:
You can manage dysfunction, it’s the Princeton University Band!
[Band marches on to Princeton Cannon Song]
There’s been a bus strike in Providence! Our hearts go out to dear friends in the Brown Band who almost didn’t make it here today due to the bus shortage. The head of the Rhode Island Association of School Committees has suggested bringing in the National Guard to drive the buses, but we have a better idea: take a ride on the Magic School Bus! They might have gotten baked into pie or turned into a Netflix reboot before they got here, but at least the Frizz would take them on the ride of their lives! Wahooo!
[Band forms a bus and plays Vehicle]
President of the Rhode Island Senate, Dominick Ruggerio, who succeeded President Weed, has a Bachelor of Science degree from Providence College. He didn’t really see a problem with the bus drivers; he thought they were just un-ionized, not unionized! Just like our Double-Double Rotating Phosphorus ion!
[Band forms the Double-Double Rotating P and plays Going Back to Nassau Hall]
Run away band, I’ve got my ion you!
Halftime:
Please accept our apologies in advance, it’s the Princeton University Band!
[Band marches on to Princeton Forward March]
Shiru Café is the newest craze in Providence. The Japanese-owned coffee shop provided students with free coffee – for a price: personal data. Free coffee for sharing a few answers that almost anyone could already find on LinkedIn. Sharing is caring for these Care Bears. But Shiru doesn’t accept offers from “general clientele” regardless of the price they’re willing to pay to get a sip. They’ve only got a thing for Brown University students. And over 69% of Brown students would let anyone take a byte for a free cup of coffee any day. Forming a byte on the field, the band performs Shut Up & Take My Data.
[Band forms a byte and plays Free Ride]
As much fun as this data-sharing revelry sounds, there are latte problems with this free coffee, because the sharing doesn’t stop at the register. Shiru requests that all drinks are consumed on the premises, so many students end up connecting to the WiFi where their data can be given to “unsavory corporate partners they’d rather avoid” like Amazon, HP, and the ever nosy U.S Government. Don’t students dread bytes of their information being stored on God knows who’s hard drives, only to be perused at a later date to stimulate corporate senses? We might dread bytes, but corporates love bytes.
[Band forms a concert arc and plays Also Sprach]
Flashers flash:
DREAD BYTES
Anagrams to:
TEDDY BEARS
Flips to:
SIS BOOM AH!
Run away band, and put that floppy disk away!
