Citadel 2008
Princeton at the Citadel
September 20th, 2008
Princeton loses 24-37
Pregame
No pregame show data available for this game.
Halftime
Don’t ask, don’t tell, it’s the Princeton University Band!
[Band marches on to the field playing “Princeton Forward March”]
Upon receiving word that The Citadel would permit us to perform a halftime show, the band was shocked by your extraordinary showing of “Southern Hospitality”. We were baffled by your decision to allow us on campus for a number of reasons. Here are a few of the “rave reviews” we’ve received for our irreverent antics:
Of course, a couple of comments from Universities like Harvard and Cornell can’t be taken seriously. However, there are some things we’ve done during our time in Charleston that we’re sure you just won’t tolerate:
[Band forms Double-Double Rotating P, plays “Going Back to Nassau Hall”]
The recent selection of Sarah Palin and Joe Biden as Vice Presidential Candidates presents us with what seems like the two dullest candidates possible. However, the Band did some research, and we discovered some unsettling facts about the candidates. Here are some things you may not know about Joe Biden:
Sarah Palin is not free of eccentricities, either. For example,
Forming an amniotic ice chipper, the Band plays “Freeze Frame”
[Band forms ice chipper, plays Freeze Frame]
While wandering through your campus today, we couldn’t help but notice a few glaring differences between our schools. For example,
Saluting Boos I, II, and IV (but not III — he was a bad dog), the band plays “241.”
[Band forms V on the field, plays “241”]
Run away band, the crowd didn’t think this show was funny!
September 20th, 2008
Princeton loses 24-37
Pregame
No pregame show data available for this game.
Halftime
Don’t ask, don’t tell, it’s the Princeton University Band!
[Band marches on to the field playing “Princeton Forward March”]
Upon receiving word that The Citadel would permit us to perform a halftime show, the band was shocked by your extraordinary showing of “Southern Hospitality”. We were baffled by your decision to allow us on campus for a number of reasons. Here are a few of the “rave reviews” we’ve received for our irreverent antics:
- The Cornell Athletics department has stated that our shows are “Inane and irrelevant, and do not contribute to a football atmosphere.”
- Librarians at Harvard pointedly asked us “Everybody hates you, why don’t you just leave?”
Of course, a couple of comments from Universities like Harvard and Cornell can’t be taken seriously. However, there are some things we’ve done during our time in Charleston that we’re sure you just won’t tolerate:
- We know you’re used to waking up at 6 AM to the sound of Reveille, but you definitely didn’t like being kept up until 6 AM by the sounds of our revelry.
- We replaced your drill rifles with Nerf guns.
- We scuffed up ALL your boots.
- We introduced your pipe band to a new kind of pipe.
- And now we’re going to Double-Double Rotating P on your field!
[Band forms Double-Double Rotating P, plays “Going Back to Nassau Hall”]
The recent selection of Sarah Palin and Joe Biden as Vice Presidential Candidates presents us with what seems like the two dullest candidates possible. However, the Band did some research, and we discovered some unsettling facts about the candidates. Here are some things you may not know about Joe Biden:
- He is the first female to be nominated for the Vice Presidency.
- Joe Biden and Hilary actually played rock-paper-scissors for the Democratic Vice-Presidential Candidacy. Hilary threw rock. Joe Biden threw rock… with foreign policy experience.
- Joe Biden lives in a glass house, and throws… nude parties.
Sarah Palin is not free of eccentricities, either. For example,
- She started a 24-hour Yeti Patrol in Wasilla
- Trig’s niece will be named “Cosine”
- In addition to ex-Governor Murkowski’s private jet, Sarah also attempted to sell 2 Aleutian Islands on eBay
- Like her running mate John McCain, Sarah also spent time in a POW camp, held against her will by a tribe of armored polar bears
- When Sarah’s water broke, it was so cold that the doctor asked her if she wanted her ice cubed, crushed, or in slivers
Forming an amniotic ice chipper, the Band plays “Freeze Frame”
[Band forms ice chipper, plays Freeze Frame]
While wandering through your campus today, we couldn’t help but notice a few glaring differences between our schools. For example,
- At The Citadel, a tour involves one hour of forced marching; at Princeton, it involves enjoying beverages at every eating club.
- Princeton and The Citadel are both in the United States — but only one of them by choice
- At The Citadel, camouflage is Tiger Stripe, Leaf, and Choco-chip; at Princeton, camouflage is Argyle, Plaid, and Seersucker
- Your targets are silhouettes; ours are places we buy our shower caddies
- At Princeton, we study abroad to learn a foreign language and experience a new culture; at The Citadel, you study a broad because you rarely see one on campus
- You have a mascot named Boo V; we do not have a mascot named Boo V.
Saluting Boos I, II, and IV (but not III — he was a bad dog), the band plays “241.”
[Band forms V on the field, plays “241”]
Run away band, the crowd didn’t think this show was funny!
