PRINCETON UNIVERSITY BAND
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Columbia 1973

Princeton at Columbia
October 6th, 1973
Princeton loses 13-14

​
Ladies and gentlemen, the Princeton University Band takes a long, hard look at places we’d hate to be.

“Princeton Forward”

One place we would least like to find ourselves is in the shoes of that illustrious statesman, Spiro T. Agnew. News leaks from Washington indicate that our verbally vexatious Vice-President has been soliciting funds for the renovation of his new “Western White House” at San Quentin. However, far from abandoning his political aspirations, Agnew seems well on his way to yet another term. Forming a license plate on the field, the Band wishes him well in his solitary quest against impending prohibition. Will Spiro ever find a home without a bar?

“Fool on The Hill” (Band forms a license plate with a 2 in it)

Speaking of coffins, can 
you think of a worse place to be? Well, that is exactly where Lady Li Tsang spent the last couple of millenia. Amazed at the excellently preserved body, scientists at the excavation site in China have estimated Lady Li’s age at 2,137 years, to which Dr. Kung Fu, discoverer of the tomb, responded gravely, “Funny, she don’t look a day past 800!” Utilizing sophisticated techniques, doctors were even able to determine the Ladi Li had borne children. Asked to comment, she said, “I don’t feel much like a mummy!”

“How Dry I Am” (Band forms ‘MOM’)

Speaking of confinement, the Band would hate to share the plight of those champions of isolation, the submariners. To ease the strain created by “stimulus impoverishment,” these sailors vie for space in the sonar room to hear the mating calls of whales. Or, when obsessed by the dangers of the turbulent sea, submariners often find themselves prowling around the craft hunting for leaks in the six-inch-thick steel hull. The Band sympathizes with these brave and lonely seamen, making their way through the swirling brine of the bottomless abyss.

“Satisfaction” (Band forms submarine)

All kidding about jails, coffins, and sea floors aside, though, folks, the place we’d most hate to be is situated right here at the bottom of the Ivy League — Columbia University!

​“Roar, Lion, Roar” (Band forms underscore) 
puband@princeton.edu
Woolworth Center
Princeton, NJ 08544
© 2019 The Trustees of Princeton University
Princeton University
  • About
    • History
    • Scramble Bands
    • Current Officers
    • Constitution >
      • Office Descriptions
      • Ivy Bands Agreement
  • Home
  • Schedule
  • Media
    • Shows
    • Music
    • Lyrics
  • Blog
  • Merchandise
  • Contact
    • Joining the Band
    • Current Officers
  • Alumni