Columbia 2001
Columbia at Princeton
September 29th, 2001
Princeton wins 44-11
Pregame:
Ladies and Gentlemen … the Princeton University Band.
“Princeton Cannon Song”
Because of the tragic events of September 11th, the home opener was postponed until tonight. We would like to welcome you to Princeton Stadium, and present a special pregame. In the spirit of the University Motto, Under God She Flourishes, we invite you to unite with us as a Community to ensure that the spirit of Princeton continues to flourish.
(Band plays “God Bless America”) (Band plays “Going Back”) (Band plays “The Star Spangled Banner”)
Halftime
Ladies and Gentleman, It takes 38 Trustees to install a President, but it only takes one… Princeton University Band
(Band Plays Princeton Forward)
Yesterday Dr. Shirley Tilghman was installed as the University’s 19th President. The Band has uncovered documents revealing other candidates for the presidency and why they were rejected:
Forming Al’s Academic Reputation, the band says “Thank God this is Princeton”
(Band forms a 0 and plays Hail to the Chief, segues into Call me Al)
With the installation of our second consecutive Canadian President, and news that the French department has seceded from other Romance languages it seems like a Canadian plot to take control of the University is in full swing. Here are some changes we expect to see soon
But seriously, folks even though President Tilghman is from the great north, there’s no real danger of a Canadian Takeover. I repeat: En realité, le canada ne menace pas notre université.
(Band forms flag with Maple leaf, which changes to a Princeton Flag and plays Oh Canada segues to We’re an American Band)
Run Away Band, it’s Celine Dion and she’s aboot to sing, eh?
September 29th, 2001
Princeton wins 44-11
Pregame:
Ladies and Gentlemen … the Princeton University Band.
“Princeton Cannon Song”
Because of the tragic events of September 11th, the home opener was postponed until tonight. We would like to welcome you to Princeton Stadium, and present a special pregame. In the spirit of the University Motto, Under God She Flourishes, we invite you to unite with us as a Community to ensure that the spirit of Princeton continues to flourish.
(Band plays “God Bless America”) (Band plays “Going Back”) (Band plays “The Star Spangled Banner”)
Halftime
Ladies and Gentleman, It takes 38 Trustees to install a President, but it only takes one… Princeton University Band
(Band Plays Princeton Forward)
Yesterday Dr. Shirley Tilghman was installed as the University’s 19th President. The Band has uncovered documents revealing other candidates for the presidency and why they were rejected:
- Steve Forbes and Bill Bradley both lost in the primary
- President Shapiro’s Brother was found to be the evil twin
- Prince wanted to change the our name to The University Formerly known as Princeton
- Brother Stephen was Vetoed by God ’00
- God ’00 wasn’t Canadian
- No one knows why David Duchovny was rejected, but the truth is out there
- Bill Clinton wasn’t concerned enough about the University’s endowment
- Al Gore was rejected because there’s too much sculpture on campus already, and besides, we only hire real academics.
Forming Al’s Academic Reputation, the band says “Thank God this is Princeton”
(Band forms a 0 and plays Hail to the Chief, segues into Call me Al)
With the installation of our second consecutive Canadian President, and news that the French department has seceded from other Romance languages it seems like a Canadian plot to take control of the University is in full swing. Here are some changes we expect to see soon
- Proctors will be replaced with Mounties
- Baseball will be replaced with Varsity Curling
- Nude Iditerod will be held in Holder Courtyard
- Only Molson will be served at Reunions
- The line between Princeton borough and township will be the longest undefended border in Mercer County
- Our endowment will increase to 12 billion dollars… Canadian
- The U-store will be duty free
- Princeton Fur Traders, the new student agency
- USG sponsored healthcare
- And the Honor code will state “I pledge my honor that I have not violated the honor code, eh?”
But seriously, folks even though President Tilghman is from the great north, there’s no real danger of a Canadian Takeover. I repeat: En realité, le canada ne menace pas notre université.
(Band forms flag with Maple leaf, which changes to a Princeton Flag and plays Oh Canada segues to We’re an American Band)
Run Away Band, it’s Celine Dion and she’s aboot to sing, eh?
