Columbia 2010
Princeton at Columbia
October 2, 2010
Princeton loses 14-42
Pregame:
Almost as orange as Snooki’s face, it’s the Princeton University Band.
It’s Banned Book Week and several slighted authors have been teaming up to create the ultimate banned book. Here are some examples:
(Band forms a lowercase “c”, and plays “Roar, Lion, Roar.”)
And now, Snooki, Fried Oreos, The Situation, Spray tans, Land fills, Gardens, Jon Stewart, Turnpikes, Jagerbombs, My New Haircut, New York Giants, Cake Boss, The Boss, Bon Jovi, Real Housewives, The Sopranos WaWa, Chris Christie,
And the Double-Double Rotating Population Density!
(Band forms DDRP, and plays “Going Back”)
Run Away Band, we’ve got a Situation on our Hands.
Halftime:
Escaping justice like Lindsey Lohan, it’s the Princeton University Band!
(Band marches onto the field playing Princeton Forward March.)
During Freshman Orientation, Princeton’s Class of 2014 was tasked with completing a challenging scavenger hunt as part of their residential college bicker process. Here are some of the more interesting items:
(The band forms a piece of bread, and plays “Children of Sanchez”)
Once upon a time in a Far Away Land, there lived a young hero named Beffrey Jagdis III Esquire, Prince of Orange and Nassau, Duke of West Windsor. After he successfully slayed the evil dragon of Thesis, he yearned to voyage to the magical land of New York, questing for the Holy Google. Beffrey’s fairy godmother Tirley Shilghman transformed a pumpkin into an orange vespa, and he began to search day and night for the Holy Google. On the third day, he was feeling lucky: he turned left and finally came upon the Temple of the Holy Google. He was disappointed to find that it was not a mystical object but a place that expected him to DO things, and cruelly only allowed him two score days of vacation. Disillusioned, he wandered until he found the Magical Square of Time and encountered there a Tastefully Dressed Cowboy. The Cowboy shared a cautionary tale: he had invested his clothing in Lehman Brothers stock, which ended in him losing the shirt off his back and pants off his behind. He warned that should Beffrey invest his soul in the concrete jungle, he would never be able to leave. Beffrey decided that it would be best if he heeded the Cowboy’s words and mounted his trusty steed, fleeing as fast as his Vespa could carry him, at a blistering pace of 25 miles an hour. He was happy to have escaped the concrete jungle and returned to his palatial estate in New Jersey, where everyone lives happily ever after.
Forming Beffrey’s palace, the band plays “Farewell to the Jungle.”
(The band forms a castle and plays “Welcome to the Jungle.”)
Run Away Band, [BEEP] University Congress was wiretapping this show.
October 2, 2010
Princeton loses 14-42
Pregame:
Almost as orange as Snooki’s face, it’s the Princeton University Band.
It’s Banned Book Week and several slighted authors have been teaming up to create the ultimate banned book. Here are some examples:
- Anne Frank has Two Mommies
- Harry Potter and the Goblet of Satanic Verses
- Catch-22 Huckleberries
- The Grapes of Animal Farm
- Alice’s Adventures in The Brave New World
- Fahrenheit 1984
- Uncle Tom’s Lolita
(Band forms a lowercase “c”, and plays “Roar, Lion, Roar.”)
And now, Snooki, Fried Oreos, The Situation, Spray tans, Land fills, Gardens, Jon Stewart, Turnpikes, Jagerbombs, My New Haircut, New York Giants, Cake Boss, The Boss, Bon Jovi, Real Housewives, The Sopranos WaWa, Chris Christie,
And the Double-Double Rotating Population Density!
(Band forms DDRP, and plays “Going Back”)
Run Away Band, we’ve got a Situation on our Hands.
Halftime:
Escaping justice like Lindsey Lohan, it’s the Princeton University Band!
(Band marches onto the field playing Princeton Forward March.)
During Freshman Orientation, Princeton’s Class of 2014 was tasked with completing a challenging scavenger hunt as part of their residential college bicker process. Here are some of the more interesting items:
- Don’t take a picture on top of the Dinky.
- Eat every flavor from all four ice cream shops.
- Try to find something under twenty dollars at J. Crew.
- Tackle anyone you see carrying a cane. Candy canes don’t count so stay away from Santa Claus.
- Streak the field at the Columbia football game…ladies.
- Find someone without their collar popped.
- Challenge President Shirley Tilghman to a pull up contest. Prepare to lose, weaklings!
- Find Forbes college – you get a flashlight, compass, several days provisions, and a sherpa.
- Try to find someone wearing the horribly clashing colors of orange and black… just kidding orange and black are fabulous.
- Meet someone from Montana, preferably named Hannah.
- Take a picture of tourists taking pictures of Nassau Hall.
- Ask every freshman you meet their SAT scores.
- Climb into a plaid van with free candy inside.
- Find a Cloister Inn member who wasn’t hosed from a bicker club.
- Find something at Hoagie Haven that won’t cause immediate cardiac arrest.
(The band forms a piece of bread, and plays “Children of Sanchez”)
Once upon a time in a Far Away Land, there lived a young hero named Beffrey Jagdis III Esquire, Prince of Orange and Nassau, Duke of West Windsor. After he successfully slayed the evil dragon of Thesis, he yearned to voyage to the magical land of New York, questing for the Holy Google. Beffrey’s fairy godmother Tirley Shilghman transformed a pumpkin into an orange vespa, and he began to search day and night for the Holy Google. On the third day, he was feeling lucky: he turned left and finally came upon the Temple of the Holy Google. He was disappointed to find that it was not a mystical object but a place that expected him to DO things, and cruelly only allowed him two score days of vacation. Disillusioned, he wandered until he found the Magical Square of Time and encountered there a Tastefully Dressed Cowboy. The Cowboy shared a cautionary tale: he had invested his clothing in Lehman Brothers stock, which ended in him losing the shirt off his back and pants off his behind. He warned that should Beffrey invest his soul in the concrete jungle, he would never be able to leave. Beffrey decided that it would be best if he heeded the Cowboy’s words and mounted his trusty steed, fleeing as fast as his Vespa could carry him, at a blistering pace of 25 miles an hour. He was happy to have escaped the concrete jungle and returned to his palatial estate in New Jersey, where everyone lives happily ever after.
Forming Beffrey’s palace, the band plays “Farewell to the Jungle.”
(The band forms a castle and plays “Welcome to the Jungle.”)
Run Away Band, [BEEP] University Congress was wiretapping this show.
