Harvard 1988
Princeton vs. Harvard
October 22nd, 1988
Outcome Unknown
Today Palmer stadium, tomorrow the world. The Princeton University Band takes a nitty gritty, down and dirty look at “Princeton in the Nation’s Service.”
“Princeton Forward”
Consider Princeton’s many contributions to the arts — fine and otherwise. Princeton has produced many great actors such as James Stewart, Wayne Rogers, Sir Lawrence Olivier, and Brooke Shields. Princeton has had its share of great authors: F. Scott Fitzgerald, Eugene O’Neill, William Shakespeare, and Brooke Shields. Not to mention such musicians as Stanley Jordan, Milton Babbit, Elvis Presley, who has been romantically linked to Brooke Shields, Johan Sebastian Bach, and the Princeton University Band — shown here. But the Band’s favorite form of entertainment is supplied by alumni such as Eric Molson, Adolph Coors, Augie Busch, and Elmo Moosehead, who have elevated yeast to an art form. Saluting those who brew in our nation’s service, the Band forms a sixteen ounce can of Princeton’s favorite liquid asset.
“Miller Time” (Band forms a beer can)
Speaking of liquid assets, not even Princeton’s most famous alumnus, God, Class of ‘0, could cover up Princeton’s embarrassing new budget deficit. Isn’t it interesting that Princeton developed a budget deficit only months after Paul Volcker arrived from the Federal Reserve Board? Coincidence? You decide. There’s only one solution. It’s time to call for monetary aid. There — on the horizon, with a glint of change and a hearty “Hi Ho Silver Standard,” it’s Malcolm Forbes, Princeton’s low-interest loan arranger.
“William Tell Overture” (Band form $, changes to -$)
One Princetonian has singlehandedly assembled the nation’s most potent defense. No, it’s not Steve Tosches; it’s our favorite Tiger in the Nation’s Service — Secretary of State George Schultz. Do you realize it would only take one word from George to turn Cambridge into a nuclear wasteland? But these burdens of power don’t frighten a man who has a tiger on his tail. We don’t wish to needle George Schultz about his little secret. We realize that it’s rude to make the Secretary of State the butt of our jokes, but we’d like to get to the bottom of this matter. Please don’t misunderstand us, we’re behind George one hundred percent. But we’ve made asses of ourselves before, and we will again, shown here.
“Tiger Rag” (Band forms George Shultz’s butt, Tiger mascot on one cheek)
Much to our chagrin, there is no Princetonian in this year’s Presidential race. The oval office seems destined to end up in the hands of one of the little two from the big three. But Princeton’s time will come. Either George Bush or the Duke will eventually leave the White House. The Band forsees the day when the mace of power passes to a true tiger. In just twelve short years Princeton’s most experienced campaigner will come of age: Stan Park ’85. Will America be ready by 2001? The Band thinks so, and to celebrate we now play President Park’s inauguration theme.
“2001” (Band forms concert shell with flashers) PRINCETON RULES DUKE BRING MACE! NUKE CAMBRIDGE!
Open the Art Museum doors, Hal. Hal, open the Art Museum doors.
October 22nd, 1988
Outcome Unknown
Today Palmer stadium, tomorrow the world. The Princeton University Band takes a nitty gritty, down and dirty look at “Princeton in the Nation’s Service.”
“Princeton Forward”
Consider Princeton’s many contributions to the arts — fine and otherwise. Princeton has produced many great actors such as James Stewart, Wayne Rogers, Sir Lawrence Olivier, and Brooke Shields. Princeton has had its share of great authors: F. Scott Fitzgerald, Eugene O’Neill, William Shakespeare, and Brooke Shields. Not to mention such musicians as Stanley Jordan, Milton Babbit, Elvis Presley, who has been romantically linked to Brooke Shields, Johan Sebastian Bach, and the Princeton University Band — shown here. But the Band’s favorite form of entertainment is supplied by alumni such as Eric Molson, Adolph Coors, Augie Busch, and Elmo Moosehead, who have elevated yeast to an art form. Saluting those who brew in our nation’s service, the Band forms a sixteen ounce can of Princeton’s favorite liquid asset.
“Miller Time” (Band forms a beer can)
Speaking of liquid assets, not even Princeton’s most famous alumnus, God, Class of ‘0, could cover up Princeton’s embarrassing new budget deficit. Isn’t it interesting that Princeton developed a budget deficit only months after Paul Volcker arrived from the Federal Reserve Board? Coincidence? You decide. There’s only one solution. It’s time to call for monetary aid. There — on the horizon, with a glint of change and a hearty “Hi Ho Silver Standard,” it’s Malcolm Forbes, Princeton’s low-interest loan arranger.
“William Tell Overture” (Band form $, changes to -$)
One Princetonian has singlehandedly assembled the nation’s most potent defense. No, it’s not Steve Tosches; it’s our favorite Tiger in the Nation’s Service — Secretary of State George Schultz. Do you realize it would only take one word from George to turn Cambridge into a nuclear wasteland? But these burdens of power don’t frighten a man who has a tiger on his tail. We don’t wish to needle George Schultz about his little secret. We realize that it’s rude to make the Secretary of State the butt of our jokes, but we’d like to get to the bottom of this matter. Please don’t misunderstand us, we’re behind George one hundred percent. But we’ve made asses of ourselves before, and we will again, shown here.
“Tiger Rag” (Band forms George Shultz’s butt, Tiger mascot on one cheek)
Much to our chagrin, there is no Princetonian in this year’s Presidential race. The oval office seems destined to end up in the hands of one of the little two from the big three. But Princeton’s time will come. Either George Bush or the Duke will eventually leave the White House. The Band forsees the day when the mace of power passes to a true tiger. In just twelve short years Princeton’s most experienced campaigner will come of age: Stan Park ’85. Will America be ready by 2001? The Band thinks so, and to celebrate we now play President Park’s inauguration theme.
“2001” (Band forms concert shell with flashers) PRINCETON RULES DUKE BRING MACE! NUKE CAMBRIDGE!
Open the Art Museum doors, Hal. Hal, open the Art Museum doors.
