Maine 1980
Maine at Princeton
November 8th, 1980
Princeton wins 24-7
[PUB performing as the University of Maine Band]
(Read in a down-East accent) Ladies and gentlemen, in its first year of music, marching, mirth, and not being able to get here from there, the University of Maine Potted Lobster Marching Band takes a short, soft look.
(Block Band walks on to “Rock Lobster” from wrong end of the field with no jackets.)
“Well, Burt, I just had to shoot my dog.”
“Were he mad?”
“Well, I reckon he weren’t too pleased.”
“How Much Is That Doggie In The Window?” (Band forms 2 horizontal lines)
“Can I take this road to Portland?”
“Yeah, but they probably already have enough up there.”
(Lines switch places)
“Have you lived here all your life?”
“Not yet”
“Rock Lobster” (Band forms concert shell)
[PUB as... the PUB]
Ladies and gentlemen, the Princeton University Band takes a long, hard look at something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.
“Princeton Forward”
Princeton is old. “Ah, yes, I remember it well. F. Scott and I would head to to suck down on a few brews after squash. It was so key; the campus, the alcohol, the Smithies. And then one day the sot kicked. The place just isn’t the same anymore.” But this side of paradise hasn’t changed that much over the years. There’s still some intense drinking action and Cottage still imports women…in the Spring. There are still more squash courts than professors and the student body still looks like an L.L. Bean catalogue. Fear not concerned alumni — we haven’t changed a bit. Bummer!
“I’ll Be Seeing You” (Band forms T-shirt with alligator on it)
What’s newer than New Wave music? Now that disco is dead and buried, it looks like Punk is here to stay. Lead by groups with names we’re not allowed to say in half-time shows, fed by record companies out to cash in quick, and sped by drugs even the Band is afraid to try, it looks as if the Boogie Wonderland will soon be deserted for greener, meaner, obscener pastures. Forming a safety pin on the field, the Band offers its assistance.
“I’d Like To Teach The World To Sing” (Band forms safety pin)
Stop. Put your pencils down. Now hand in your answer sheets back to your neighbor so that he can sign the pledge. Yes, everything is borrowed at Princeton. Students borrow answers from their classmates, the Honor Committee borrows tactics from the Spanish Inquisition, and the administration borrows ideas from Yale. Saluting Creative Thinking and Originality, the Band salutes Creative Thinking and Originality. Forming:
a) Creative Thinking and Originality
b) Creative Thinking and Originality, or
c) Creative Thinking and Originality
We say simply — “Saludo Creative Thinking and Originality.”
“My And My Shadow” (Band forms ‘C.T.&O.’)
And what do you think when you think of Blue? The Band thinks of the Blues that the soon to be black and blue Yale boy’s football team will be singing after a thrashing by the Tigers in New Haven next week.
“Basin Street Blues”
November 8th, 1980
Princeton wins 24-7
[PUB performing as the University of Maine Band]
(Read in a down-East accent) Ladies and gentlemen, in its first year of music, marching, mirth, and not being able to get here from there, the University of Maine Potted Lobster Marching Band takes a short, soft look.
(Block Band walks on to “Rock Lobster” from wrong end of the field with no jackets.)
“Well, Burt, I just had to shoot my dog.”
“Were he mad?”
“Well, I reckon he weren’t too pleased.”
“How Much Is That Doggie In The Window?” (Band forms 2 horizontal lines)
“Can I take this road to Portland?”
“Yeah, but they probably already have enough up there.”
(Lines switch places)
“Have you lived here all your life?”
“Not yet”
“Rock Lobster” (Band forms concert shell)
[PUB as... the PUB]
Ladies and gentlemen, the Princeton University Band takes a long, hard look at something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.
“Princeton Forward”
Princeton is old. “Ah, yes, I remember it well. F. Scott and I would head to to suck down on a few brews after squash. It was so key; the campus, the alcohol, the Smithies. And then one day the sot kicked. The place just isn’t the same anymore.” But this side of paradise hasn’t changed that much over the years. There’s still some intense drinking action and Cottage still imports women…in the Spring. There are still more squash courts than professors and the student body still looks like an L.L. Bean catalogue. Fear not concerned alumni — we haven’t changed a bit. Bummer!
“I’ll Be Seeing You” (Band forms T-shirt with alligator on it)
What’s newer than New Wave music? Now that disco is dead and buried, it looks like Punk is here to stay. Lead by groups with names we’re not allowed to say in half-time shows, fed by record companies out to cash in quick, and sped by drugs even the Band is afraid to try, it looks as if the Boogie Wonderland will soon be deserted for greener, meaner, obscener pastures. Forming a safety pin on the field, the Band offers its assistance.
“I’d Like To Teach The World To Sing” (Band forms safety pin)
Stop. Put your pencils down. Now hand in your answer sheets back to your neighbor so that he can sign the pledge. Yes, everything is borrowed at Princeton. Students borrow answers from their classmates, the Honor Committee borrows tactics from the Spanish Inquisition, and the administration borrows ideas from Yale. Saluting Creative Thinking and Originality, the Band salutes Creative Thinking and Originality. Forming:
a) Creative Thinking and Originality
b) Creative Thinking and Originality, or
c) Creative Thinking and Originality
We say simply — “Saludo Creative Thinking and Originality.”
“My And My Shadow” (Band forms ‘C.T.&O.’)
And what do you think when you think of Blue? The Band thinks of the Blues that the soon to be black and blue Yale boy’s football team will be singing after a thrashing by the Tigers in New Haven next week.
“Basin Street Blues”
