Monmouth 2021
Princeton at Monmouth
October 9, 2021
Princeton wins 31-28
Monmouth did not allow a field show at this game. Nor did they allow us to bring our instruments. In fact, they even made us buy our own tickets. Jerks. But we still went, and we sang instead, so take that, Monmouth!
We had this field show prepared for a nearby peewee football game that ended up not happening due to last-minute cancellation on their end:
Not exactly what you were expecting, it’s the Princeton University Band!
[Band marches on to “Princeton Forward March”]
What precision! Always a joy to watch! Welcome, one and all, to the show of the finest marching band in the country! Ohio State wishes they could do that.
You were expecting a marching band, and you were half right? Well, you’d be totally right if you considered what we’re doing right now to be marching. In fact, it is just an advanced marching technique called scrambling. It is an incredibly precise technique that only a master could teach you. We are only the most sophisticated—hey wait, no, don’t do THAT
to Santa—ahem. The most sophisticated marching band, and we could teach you!
Here are some other advanced marching techniques we could teach you (available at
Princeton only!):
- Marching ALLL the way around a baseball diamond
- Embracing alternative hydration to stay in tipsy-topsy shape
- Wearing socks
- Using a pool table correctly
- Quickly drinking … milk
Your parents might not have the greatest opinion of us right now, but we’re sure you’ll be totally alright. Forming a “P” for Princeton, the Band plays “The Kids Are Totally Alright.”
[Band forms non-rotating P and plays “The Kids Aren’t Alright”]
This is all very far in the future, though–you still have so much childhood ahead of you! Trust us, it only goes downhill from here. But you have so much to enjoy while it lasts, from fun, in-school “drills,” to cool mask choices (ours have holes in them!), to *playing* on the playground.
But by far, the thing that has improved childhood so much since we left is Fortnite. We wish we could’ve accidentally bought hundreds of dollars of V-bucks with Mommy’s credit card and then played the most enriching, educational video game in existence.
That doesn’t work for you either, parents? Well, at this point, I guess we should just shut up and do the Orange Justice.
Band forms a V-buck and plays “Shut Up and Dance.”
[Band forms a coin and plays Shut Up and Dance]
And now, we will leave you in the only way we know how. Run away, Band!
[Band moseys off while playing “Rock Lobster.”]
October 9, 2021
Princeton wins 31-28
Monmouth did not allow a field show at this game. Nor did they allow us to bring our instruments. In fact, they even made us buy our own tickets. Jerks. But we still went, and we sang instead, so take that, Monmouth!
We had this field show prepared for a nearby peewee football game that ended up not happening due to last-minute cancellation on their end:
Not exactly what you were expecting, it’s the Princeton University Band!
[Band marches on to “Princeton Forward March”]
What precision! Always a joy to watch! Welcome, one and all, to the show of the finest marching band in the country! Ohio State wishes they could do that.
You were expecting a marching band, and you were half right? Well, you’d be totally right if you considered what we’re doing right now to be marching. In fact, it is just an advanced marching technique called scrambling. It is an incredibly precise technique that only a master could teach you. We are only the most sophisticated—hey wait, no, don’t do THAT
to Santa—ahem. The most sophisticated marching band, and we could teach you!
Here are some other advanced marching techniques we could teach you (available at
Princeton only!):
- Marching ALLL the way around a baseball diamond
- Embracing alternative hydration to stay in tipsy-topsy shape
- Wearing socks
- Using a pool table correctly
- Quickly drinking … milk
Your parents might not have the greatest opinion of us right now, but we’re sure you’ll be totally alright. Forming a “P” for Princeton, the Band plays “The Kids Are Totally Alright.”
[Band forms non-rotating P and plays “The Kids Aren’t Alright”]
This is all very far in the future, though–you still have so much childhood ahead of you! Trust us, it only goes downhill from here. But you have so much to enjoy while it lasts, from fun, in-school “drills,” to cool mask choices (ours have holes in them!), to *playing* on the playground.
But by far, the thing that has improved childhood so much since we left is Fortnite. We wish we could’ve accidentally bought hundreds of dollars of V-bucks with Mommy’s credit card and then played the most enriching, educational video game in existence.
That doesn’t work for you either, parents? Well, at this point, I guess we should just shut up and do the Orange Justice.
Band forms a V-buck and plays “Shut Up and Dance.”
[Band forms a coin and plays Shut Up and Dance]
And now, we will leave you in the only way we know how. Run away, Band!
[Band moseys off while playing “Rock Lobster.”]
